Hot Squirrells

Ok, so Felicia and I were in Taco Johns, and the sauce packets have little sayings on them. One of them says "How many of these do you already have in your glove box?" Well, the last time that we were there, she had taken a good 15 or so of them, so I showed it to her with a smile. She's like "I used to have a bunch of them in my glove box, but something ate them." I'm like "What did?" She's like "Oh this squirrel, it climbed up through the engine and somehow got into my glovebox and it ate all my hot sauce."

WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!

Do You Believe That Forks Evolved From Spoons?

Yes, I do. The reason is this. Evolution results from necessity, and while spoons were very good at scooping things, they were not so good at spearing, and as humans developed the sport of spearing fish, the need arose for tableware that suited the new fad. That is why we now have forks. Spoons were not, however replaced, as they still serve a purpose not met by forks. You cannot eat soup with a fork. That is why the spoon population remains undiminished. Each utensil serves its own great purpose, and the two are able to coexist peacefully.

There are a few things in life which I have learned you should never take for granted. It is so easy for us to become accustomed to things we experience every day. And to no longer realize its worth. This is unfortunate, as we learn too late the values of life, love, and friendship.

Life

This morning, I arrived home from work and received a message from a very upset sounding Crystal. Worried as hell, I called her back to see what was up. I found out that two of my friends had been in a bad car accident, and that they were in the hospital. Not knowing anything more than that was the worst part, although I have to say that it was much easier on me to find out the details after knowing that they were alive, and that although they weren't the most comfortable they had ever been, they would be alright. All I can say is that someone was looking out for them, and I thank Them with everything I have.

Terry is someone you never can forget, even when you want to. There is a reason that I fell for him in the first place, and no matter how hard I tried to push him out of my memories, I knew all along it was a lost cause. A guy like that doesn't come around very often, and I can see why God didn't want to take him from the world just yet. He has been an important part in a lot of peoples lives. He taught me a few things, and when you spend months thinking about something, you aren't likely to forget it. Anyway, needless to say, I was a mess while I was waiting to hear about his condition. All day, I felt a heavy weight on my chest. There was no way that he would leave us. He couldn't. He just couldn't. What would I do without my Tonto? What would Crystal do? You cannot imagine the way my heart soared when Crystal informed me that he was sitting next to her in the car and they were on their way home. It was one of the best feelings in the world, going from being terrified to estaticly relieved. I was able to talk to him on the phone, and although in our conversation I didn't even come close to expressing how I felt at that moment, I was able to breath easy again.

Jon, well I can't say I know him very well, but I can assure you that getting to know him is a journey I am excited to take. He had it in for me since last year, and at that time, I thought he was an ass, to be honest. But when we managed to achieve civilized conversation, I realized that I quite like him when he isn't shouting obscenities and unjustified death threats at me. He is a lot like me, and I am amazed that I can be myself around him and know he will accept me. I accept him too, and I think he is a great guy who doesn't get the appreciation or acknowledgement he deserves. I hope that everything works out for him as well, and I will be thinking about him a lot in the next few days, I guarantee.

Never take life for granted, because you never know when your time is up. Never take anyone for granted, for the same is true of them. Don't waste your time being angry at someone, because if you were to find out that they died, and the last words you said to them were "I hate you", how would you feel? On the contrary, always make a point to let your loved ones know how you feel. Let them know that even when you disapprove of their actions, even when they let you down, you still love them. Don't assume that they know, because no matter how sure you are, it's always nice to hear.

To all my friends...I love you and I don't know what I would do without you. Even the ones I don't keep in touch with, even the ones I haven't spoken to in years, even those who are out of my live completely, every one of you has made some sort of positive contribution to my life. Each of you is specail to me, and don't ever feel like no one cares about you.

Tyler, you are my "brother". You have been there for me so many times. You made senior year awesome. It means so much that you stay in touch, as many do not.

Tammy, I really miss our stupid little jokes and the like. School would have been quite alot more boring had you not been there.

Crystal, I hope I don't have to tell you all the ways you have helped me, or I will be here all "knight". Haha...OK that was lame. Seriously, I can't believe all the fights we have been through, and for some reason, we still like each other. I don't get it, but it works, and I'm so very glad.

Terry, you have no idea what you have taught me, and no idea what it means to me to have you back in my life again. I know this is ridiculoius, but if you hadn't made it through today, I would want more than anything to be right there with you where ever you ended up, and I wouldn't say that about many people. In fact, I can only think of one other, and I think you know who he is.

Go Check It Out!!! Recently Undated A LOT!!!!!

When I first posted the link to my site, I neglected the fact that tripod does not publish automatically after each change is made, so if you looked at it, it probably sucked. But I have just now re-published it, adn it seems to be in good working order, so I urge you to go look around.

http://sakura-aeris.tripod.com/

The other day, I was talking to Daniel on msn messenger and he had asked me why I loved him, so I asked him why he loved me. He responded with an emoticon of a snail. I'm like "Snail???" He's like "What? Is that a bad reason?"

Ya, it was so cute. :)

D'oh! Ya Got Me!

Just a bit ago, Felicia told me some disturbing news about somethng she had told someone regarding what I said about them. Hope that didn't confuse you...anyway, in an effort to get her back I pretended to call her crush, and she "shot" me for it. Now, I'm all for realism, so I fell down. Or should I say, I cleared a spot on the floor, carefully got down, first on one knee, then both, then laid down on the floor, strategically placing my head on a pillow. As she sat there laughing at me, I exclaimed, with sincerity, "What? You don't want me to get hurt, do ya?"

Got to Agree With You, (You Know Who You Are When You Read This)

A friend of mine recently added a post that really got me going. To sum it up, she is being accused of cheating because she is friends with her ex-boyfriend. I am not going to get all into that, because you can go find her post if it's that important to you. www.smacksonsaturn.blogspot.com. Anyway, I just wanted to make the comment (like I could ever make just one) that it is totally unfair how guys and girls who hang out are automatically assumed to be more than friends. This especially causes a problem when one or both of them are involved in a relationship, and even more when they used to date each other. No matter the circumstance, allow me to state that it is entirely possible for a male and female to be friends, even flirt, without it going any farther.

Before I get myself into trouble, I'd better make it clear that I am not only talking about the situation at hand, so the people involved had better not hold anything against me, because its their fault if they think I am talking about them. I may or not be...This situation happens a lot, to a lot of people, and I have several examples flowing through my head at this very moment.

While I was in high school, I was evidently dating a lot of guys that I hadn't realized I was seeing. Amazing what you learn about yourself when you allow your ears to hear a bit of gossip. It's great. And it happens to nearly everyone. People evidently have nothing better to do with their time than nose in other people's business. I have adopted philosophy that I don't care what people do. If it isn't affecting me directly, I just don't give a fuck. Even if I completely disagree with it, even if I think they are being totally hypocritical, I normally try not to say much. No one is going to please everyone all the time. I know I've done things that pissed people off. I can guarantee you I felt bad about it, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't do it again. I know that sounds horrible, but sometimes, no matter what choice you make, it's going to hurt someone that you would rather not hurt. Life isn't perfect. Everyone has to deal with that fact. Yes, it completely sucks. But there isn't much you can do about it.

So anyway, it seems to me that over the years I have run across several people who don't think that a boy and girl can be just friends. It also seems to me that many, not all, but many, of those people are the ones who themselves have a hard time being just friends with someone of the opposite gender. Just because you end up messing around with most of your male friends doesn't mean other girls do, and it certainly doesn't put you in the position to criticize. I know I'm getting an evil look as I type this so let me add for the person so rudely reading over my shoulder that, as previously mentioned, I don't care what you do. It don't hurt me none. Just don't hate others for it just 'cuz it ain't you.

Those Poor Children!!

I was looking at www.babynames.com (don't ask why) and anyway, there is a database of like 6,500 names from every nationality in the world (maybe?) so anyway, I thought I would start by looking at only the "American" ones. I soon reconsidered. You see, most of the names we use in America came from other countries, and the ones that are truly American are the ones which have been invented right here at home. I now understand why we borrow names from other areas of the world. They are obviously much better at the art of naming. Allow me to explain. A name which, as a nickname, may be fine (although that could be disputed) is Pooky. Many others sound more like adjectives describing the person, rather than a name to appear on a birth certificate include, among others, Blue, Red, Teal, Brilliant, Content, Early, Happy, Lucky, Modesty, Obedience, Unity, and Trapper. Objects are also being used, for example, Butterfly, Cinnamon, Denim, Dragon, and Stone. A few other names that I don't know where the fuck they came from include Mystery, Nature, Rangle, Starbuck, Velvet, Welcome, Wind, Infinity, Ireland, and Minor.

I saved for last the very funniest one I found. This one makes me crack up terribly every time I think of it. I feel so sorry for the child who has to answer to the name Moon-Unit.

Who's That Pretty Girl In That Mirror There?

If you haven't ever seen my dad, imagine a large man in his 60's with crazy grey-black hair sticking out every which way wearing a t-shirt with a dragon screenprint on the front and a pair of bright yellow windbreaker pants. Now try to imagine him fluttering his hands near his shoulders while singing in a high pitched "I feel preetttyyyy, oh so preetttyyy!" The best part is that he then looked at me and asked, completely seriously "What comes next? Something about being gay..."

Spaghetti Feathers

Felicia and I went to the store today to buy Spaghetti O's and when we got home, were very anxious to eat them. Make note of the fact that our cans were of the variety with chopped up pieces of hotdogs. As I sat there dispensing the tomatoey goods into my mouth, I made the disastrous mistake of skimming over the ingredients list. If you don't know what hotdogs consist of, I feel it's in your best interest to not look into it."Mechanically separated chicken" I read out loud, to which Felicia responded with an explanation. "They thrown the chicken into a machine that takes out all bones and feathers and stuff." This lead us into a vividly disturbing conversation about whether or not we would be able to notice a finely chopped piece that was overlooked during processing. Needless to say, this resulted in my upchuck reflexes being in overdrive for the next 30 minutes or so. So anyway, fast forward a few hours later. We are sitting in our room getting ready to watch a movie when she spots a furry mass on the floor. "Is that hair?" she askes. "No," I say " It's a feather from your fucking Spaghetti O's!!"

To make it even better, I had been considering eating my other can of Spaghetti O's. I reconsidered for a moment before realizing that the remaining can had meatballs, not chopped up hotdogs. "There's no chicken in beef, right?" I ask. Derrr. Why do I get the feeling that I'm never gonna live this one down?

Freaky Dream

I just had to type up this dream, 'cuz it scared the shit out of me:

I was somewhere, with someone, doing something (pardon me for being a little vague on the details, I don't remember it very well) when I received word, from a call, I'm assuming, that there was a bomb headed toward us. I remember thinking to myself "I knew it...Ever since I saw that show years ago about the Bible codes, and they said there would be a nuclear war in the years 2004 and 2006, I knew this would happen. I could just see it getting closer and closer as the media reported on this and that. As the year came to a close, I was comforted with the fact of knowing it had been wrong, but shit, here it comes." So anyway, I head off in my car to Watertown, apparently the nearest bomb shelter. I wanted so badly to call Daniel's house and let them know about it, but I think I was afraid they either wouldn't believe me, or that they were already on their way and that if they had to pause to answer the phone, it would be too late. In any case, I didn't call anyone. Instead I just drove off, following a herd of other cars headed that way. The road was very icy, and so we were traveling at a rather slow rate. Somewhere along the journey, I saw a bit of orange out of the corner of my eye, and glancing to the right of me at the sky I saw a brilliant ball of fire heading towards the ground. It didn't appear to be moving all that fast, yet the fact remains that it wasn't there before, and now it was, therefore it must have been moving rather quickly. As the guy ahead of me picked up speed, I floored it and off we went. For some reason, I was thinking that if I used my feet to scoot the car, it would go faster as well as have better traction on the ground (flinstone mobile, perhaps?). Eventually, I got to the shelter where everyone else seemed to be having a good time. I vaguely recall a sense of safety like there was nothing more to worry about. I awoke at this point, and so I'm not sure what happened to the world. As I said, this dream scared the shit out of me. End of the world dreams generally do.

RIP Froggies Who Never Existed

Back a month or so ago, maybe longer, my roomate and I decided that since we couldn't bring my hamster or her snowdog to stay with us, that we would buy a couple betas. These are very pretty fish who can't get along with each other. Each of us later invested (or rather I did...in fact, I bought everything) in two African Dwarf Frogs, one for each beta. Frogs were not fish, technically, and therefore not allowed in the dorms, so only our friends knew we had them, thus the title of this blog. They got along fine, which is why it is most unfortunate that they are both dead now. Kermie was found upside-down on Sunday and Darius went out Tuesday.

"Darius"
"Ya?"
"There's a goblin sneaking up on you."
"So?"
"Just saying..."

Well, he killed you, fuckhead, so you'd better care!!!!!!

*sniff*

Ponderings of One Depressed Muggle

I realize, as I sit here amongst my things in my dorm room, that I have no life. I go from day to day with no purpose, no meaning. I am irritated at everyone, every thing. I no longer attend my classes. They are of no use to me. College is just tests and essays, the time between merely filler. As long as I get them done and show up to hand them in, that's all that matters. Of course, the problem of procrastination has made even that a little stressful. Luckily, I have managed it well so far, making perfect marks on all my essays and speeches, despite the fact they were prepared the night before and/or the morning of. When I think about it, college is much different than high school. I have prepared a little chart for you as a visual:

High School
7 straight hours of learning fun
same 6 or so classes daily
one predecided meal each day
study halls must be spent studying, or at least being quiet
a no-show to class provokes a call home
daily homework leading up to test



College
a couple scattered classes each day
each class only meets two or three times a week
a variety of foods similar to those in your favorite restaurants
time between classes can be spent however you like
professors hardly notice if you're absent
tests and essays are the only grades

I much prefer how college works to high school's regimen. However, I think I am becoming dearly homesick. I'm not sure what my problem is, but whenever I'm here, I feel agitated and depressed. When I go home, even when I'm bored or unhappy, it feels better than being here. My friends up here are great, so its not their fault. I must just be homesick. I dunno...I really miss all the people I talked to in high school. I barely see any of them anymore, although they make as little effort to keep in touch as I do. I miss not knowing what's going on back home, too. Over thanksgiving and over my birthday, I went home and I instantly fell back in to the state of mind I was in 6 months ago. It didn't seem as though I had ever left. It saddens me to know that our comfort zone is still there, without me, with the inhabitants not even realizing how precious it it.

For the last week I have been so confused and depressed. I don't know who all reads this, so I wont get into detail, but ya, it sucks. I think I really need Christmas vacation to stay home and be with all my old friends, and then I will feel better...but then I won't want to come back here. This fucking sucks. In some ways I love being here, but in others I dont. I was happy at first, because I didnt have to worry about everything going on at home (by that I mean with all my old friends). I was here, starting over, and I could make a new group of friends, a new life. And at first, when I went home, I missed mycollege people. But now, I'm jsut annoyed. I'm remembering everything about home in a positive light now, and I desperately want to be a part of the next chapter. At the same time, though, being a part of it also means getting pulled down by the bad things, and it's nice to be able to escape that part. If only there were some way to be a part of both and ignore both simultaniously. But I'm pretty sure that's not posible, and I'm pretty sure that I have way too much more to say to type it all, so I am just going to quit right now.