Monday, January 31, 2005

Warning: Not For Those With Intelligence!

My friend found this, erm, video, at www.liquidgeneration.com
I must say that it is the most RIDIKULUS thing I have ever seen!!!!!! It's completely mental. Honestly! The blokes who came up with this must have been on some fucked up acid trip or something.

So I have provided you with the link. Enjoy. :)

Click Here For Ultimate Stupidity
Actually, I'd prefer you right-click and Open in a New Window to ensure that you are able to finish looking at my site :)

My Jackass Brother

This is my "brother", Tyler, at StorybookLand here in Aberdeen. He came up to visit me a couple months ago and he, Felicia, and I went to one of the few free things in town. If you haven't been there, it is basically a tribute to the great nursery rhymes and Disney classics we all know and love. There are statues, fun-houses, slides, and the large hill from "Jack and Jill" (which Felicia and I had a grand time rolling down). It was actually on that hill where he found his...ahh...ears.

Tisk tisk!! Taking advantage of poor Snow White. Don't you think she endures enough chauvinistic pig-ishness from the Dwarves? Honestly!!
I actually have another shot of him looking under Dorothy's (from The Wizard of Oz) skirt...
Here's another great shot of Tyler. All three of us had a blast with these cut-outs.

NEW AND IMPROVED

How can anything really be both? If it's new, it means there was nothing before it. If it's improved, it is an improvement of something before it.

In any case, I just spent a good 5 hours re-doing my tripod site. I added photos directly to the site, changed the layout, and added some of my poetry. PUH-PUH-PUH PLEEEEEZZZEEE go look at it, and let me know what you think!

Sunday, January 30, 2005

Daniel And The Pile Of Ducks

I don't know if I ever mentioned the story behind this picture before on here...I know it's on my Tripod photo album, and the actual quote is on my Tripod site on the quotes page, though. Anyway, here's how it goes:


I was out shopping with Stacy when I get a call from Daniel. He had been out hunting and he had fallen through the ice. While I was worried about if he was OK and telling him how scared I would have been, he tells me that he was only pissed 'cuz when the ice cracked he scared up a "pile of ducks".

Thursday, January 27, 2005

Can Your Hear Me Now?

Back home, adequate cell phone reception is a luxury. I am so grateful to be living in a bigger town that actually has towers. The unfortunate part is that all my friends back home are lacking service and so my conversations with them are still teeming with "Huh"? "What"?
Today, I actually made use of this situation. I was talking to Christina (she may have been talking back...I couldn't tell) and for some reason I started going off and saying weird shit like "Are you my conscience"? I heard some mumble of response clouded by excessive static and moments of complete silence. To this, I responded "You must be my conscience 'cuz you're really fuzzy and sometimes you disappear completely." I heard unmistakable bouts of laughter through the phone, and only then did I realize how terribly witty that was. *bows* Thank you. I'll be here all week.

Tuesday, January 18, 2005

Wasted Weekend

The first weekend after coming back to school turned out to be a three day weekend due to Martin Luther King Jr. Day. After a week full of homework assignments, the efficient scholar would have, of course, set out to do it all Friday and Saturday in order to have Sunday and Monday to enjoy at their leisure.
Not me. Felicia and I literally followed this schedule all three days:

10:00 am Wake up
Play Sims
12:00 pm Eat dinner in Student Center
1:00 Play Sims
5:00 Eat Supper
6:00 Play Sims
6:00 am Go to bed

(Notice the grueling 12 hours of strain on our finger ligaments due to the overload of mouse clicking. That's the mark of determination.)

For those of you who have never played, The Sims is a great game if you've ever dreamed of taking over the universe, or at least a small town. The actual idea is to get a job, get promotions, and build yourself up. You have to gain points in various areas of your personality as well as make friendships, in order to achieve greatness. With the discovery of the cheat code to give you unlimited funds, there is really no point in us following that route. Instead, we had fun making homosexual couples make out and sticking people into boxes with only a chair (which we eventually removed) and seeing how long they would survive. As far as the sexual mischief, it was greatly increased when Felicia discovered a download which allowed for much more "intimate relations." For the characters we actually planned on caring about, we created ourselves and our friends. I'm working on making a miniature Hogwarts. Of course, if I had the "Makin' Magic" expansion pack, that would be much easier.
Of course, we didn't spend the whole weekend drooling and staring at the screen. We also stapled, punctured, glued, and set ablaze everything we could get our hands on without getting up (including my towel, which I'm not too happy about). I actually have a burn on my hand because I lit a piece of masking tape on fire and when I hurriedly blew it out, it got me. I had the gluey stuff on my finger for awhile.
Speaking of masking tape...I was taping everything. I covered my computer, my desk drawer, my head, Stacy's wrist, and, eventually, the roll of tape, with tape. That last one was an attempt to keep me from wasting further resources. At one point before that, I was kicked out of my computer chair and took to writing out "Expecto Patronum!" on the side of my bed.
And after all that, I actually managed to get my homework done for my classes today!

Thursday, January 13, 2005

Retarded Cows

A common misunderstanding, I'm sure......

....but I have recently been informed by Daniel that the government wants to close the border between the USA and Canada because the retarded cows keep coming to America (mad cow disease).

Oh boy....

Name Change

As you can tell, (if you pay attention), I have changed my name as well as the name of this site. The address is still the same though.

My name is now Sakura Malfoy *smile*

My Old Blog Site

Here is a blog I was keeping about a year or so ago. I completely forgot about it and it was pretty damn amusing, even for me, and I wrote it!! So anyway, go take a look at it.

www.petthechicken.blogspot.com

Tuesday, January 11, 2005

Alarm Cocks

Last night, at like 2 in the morning, Felicia was saying something about her alarm clock. However, in her sleepy speech, she left out the "l". Alarm cock. Hmmm...not an altogether bad idea.

Monday, January 10, 2005

Back to Hogwarts

Christmas break is over, and I am presently seated in front of my shitty old computer in room 304 of Northern State University. Or, as I like to call it, Hogwarts. The only reason I came back for the second semester was because I had somehow convinced myself it really was the famous wizarding school. Classes start tomorow, and I am sooo not ready. I still have all my stuff out in my car, as does Felicia (in her car, mind you) and I have to prepare my bookbag for tomorow's scheduel. I also have to make me a nice little scheduel so that I may actually go to my classes this time around. Despite my many late turn-ins of major assignments and my absense from nearly all classes the last couple weeks of school, I managed to pull off two C's and three A's. Everyone back home was so damn proud of me. I was just happy I passed the two I did worst in. Anyhow, I will shortly be starting up a new line-up of new, and more challenging, classes. Damn...I'm gonna actually have to try now!!

Maybe He Ought To See A Mechanic...

My fiance is so very odd. Like a week or so ago, we were laying there in bed and, after a time in which I thought he was sleeping, he said, in sort of a disoriented sort of way, "I can't find my keys, my drive shaft is broken, and I can't fix anything." I figured that he was just waking up from a dream, and talking nonsense, so I just kinda laughed at him and and was like "What?" He repeated the sentence again, more convincingly this time, almost exasperated. "Hunny, I think you need to go back to sleep." I told him. "No, I think I'm gonna go to the bathroom." he said, jumping up.

Days later, I brought that night up to him again, hoping he would explain the dream that brought him to say such things in the middle of the night. Instead, he simple repeated it once more, looking as though he thought me dense to not have understood the first time. "But you weren't in a car. You were laying in bed!" I exclaimed. "Well, ya...That was my first predicament."

A couple days ago, as we were driving past a pasture containing several cows, he showed his brilliance again. To be honest, I'm not entirely sure that we were passing a pasture containing cows. That is my assumption. With Daniel, though, who knows. Anyway, following the sight of the cows, presumably, he says "You know what, if I was a cow...Well you know how they can't feel electric fences very much, like its only a tingle to them, well if I was a cow, I'd slap my dick up on the fence and be like ooooooohhhh moooooooo moooooooo ahhhhhhh moooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!! And then, if you were a cow, too, you could say 'Yup, that's my boyfriend getting' off on the electric fence."