Once again, i find myself thanking someone for doing something that doesn't necessarily deserve a "thanks". Through my brother I am learning the full extend of what I put Daniel through, and I feel horrible all over again. Even when we fight, as we did a couple times over spring break, I still would rather be with him and hate him for the moment than love him and know I ruined my chance to be with him. Supossedly, Terry still likes me and it's so tempting sometimes, but Daniel is my life, and many times I have said that. Over break, he took his ring back during a fight and then left the room. I immediately erupted with unstoppable tears and searched the kitchen as frantically as I could without waking anyone, and I was literally going to kill myself. I downed some tylenol pm and I found the sharpest of the new knives they got for christmas. i had it to my wrist, and something stopped me. I went back into his bedroom and we worked things out. i realized that without him, i have nothing. terry is a great friend, and i never want to lose that. but a little girl crush is not worth giving up true love that has grown so strong over almost 4 years.

***Disclaimer - don't get upset with me. i'm not implying that what you did was a mistake. i don't know who ur meant to be with and fate has a fucked up way of letting us know these things. this post was not meant to attack you, it was for me to express my feelings and my own life. i still love you like a sister.